I am officially desperate for video games.

I have reverted to and beaten Amber: Journeys Beyond in three days of play. This Windows 95 PC game has amazing graphics, even for our time, but most of the time, nothing moves. I repeat:

YOU CANNOT INTERACT WITH MOVING OBJECTS.

So, basically, its about you going to check on Roxy, a paranormal scientist, who lives at an old house because of its reputation for being haunted. When you arrive at the house IN A CUTSCENE, a giggling water apparition drives you into the freaking lake. Somehow, you start off on dry land, with the car still in the water. Roxy's in the garage, hooked up to a psychedelic ghost-world headset, unconcious, and, apparently, you have to send ghosts into the freaking beyond JUST TO TURN OFF THE HEADSET.

From then on it's future technology according to 1996, ghostie spooks, rooms flooding as you watch through a surveillance camera, but being perfectly dry when you click your way up the stairs and into it, using weed killer that completely pixel-dissolves weeds in, like, 2 frames, cheating by looking up a walkthrough online because you can't figure out what THE HECK to do with a radio that blares 1940's music...

And then dying.

And then basically being told to get the heck out of the beyond, and being told the password to Roxy's computer before you go (are all ghosts good hackers?).

And then using the computer to get the headset ready to shut off.

And then sticking the new, even more psychedelic headset you've been using on Roxy's old one, sprinting out of the garage (CUTSCENE), then watching the garage blow up with Roxy in it.

And then she walks out of the smoke unscathed (Roxy was filmed for this... cheaters.), and asks you where you parked the freaking car.

THE END.

TAH DAH!

FIN.

HAVE A NICE REST OF YOUR LIFE BEING UNSATISFIED WITH THE ENDING OF A GAME YOU WORKED YOUR BUTT OFF TO FINISH.

Woopity-freakin'-doo.

Twi-Wipe

Why?

Why?!

WHY?!!

My mother is a Twie-hard, a Fanpire. I will rue the day that all four books are neatly placed on our bookshelf next to the Harry Potter series.

First I'm denied a Harry Potter movie, now THIS? How ironic that the series I dislike the most is placed next to my favorite, and by my own mother, who has read the first two volumes and is currently reading Eclipse, and has seen the Twilight movie. Why, I ask, is it, that every single girl and gay boy has read the entire series and seen the movie? WHY?

ARGH.

If all the toilet paper in the world was burned and could not be replenished...

wait. Scratch that.

If there was no toilet paper in the house, I would...

wait. Scratch that.

I use Twilight as toilet paper.

Frickin' sparkly vampires.

Sandy Claws is Comin' to Town

One amusing Christmas memory *

1. The Nutcracker (emphasis on NUT). see HERE.

Two theories why Santa chooses the chimney as his best means of entry *

1. Santa is a vampire. His coat, once white, is stained by the blood of his victims. He set a curse upon the planet to make all Christmas celebrators go to sleep earlier than usual so he can suck their blood. Everyone else is lucky. He feels guilty, though, so he gives kids presents. His real name is Vlad Sanduklaus, and he chooses a chimney as his entry because vampires can turn into bats, which are, I daresay, small enough to fly down a chimney.

2. Santa's brother, Lance Kringle, was a burglar/male model. Santa decided to return everything his strangely attractive brother stole one year, and his brother quit stealing people's crap, and became a full-time model, and later died in a bar fight. Santa, in his depression, ate for comfort, and put on 200 lbs. To help work off this weight, he decided to make an annual 'round-the world trip. He soon realized that he should do what his brother did, but in reverse, as a tribute to Lance. So, for a workout/reverse burglary, he uses the chimney as a means to measure his waist size, and in tribute to his lost, strangely attractive, burglar/male model brother, Lance Kringle.

Three things you want for Christmas *

1. Star Wars: Force Unleashed (XBOX 360)
2. New church clothes and shoes
3. Sanity

Four of your favorite Christmas movies *

1.Elf
2. A Christmas Story
3. (I don't know if this counts, but:) The Nightmare before Christmas
4. The Grinch Who Stole Christmas (both versions)

Five ways you've been naughty this year *

Hee hee. >=)

1. Pressed the EASY button too many times (that was easy)
2. Snuck video games one night and got busted. =O
3. Ate tangerines in great amounts
4. Acted like a tard
5. "Broke" every electronic device we own

Six ways you've been nice *

1. Worked for over 72 hours on service projects
2. Got good grades!
3. Grew peach fuzz
4. Helped adjust my brother's behavior *kick*
5. Didn't act like a tard in public
6. Roasted a chicken that didn't have a bag for the giblets (great first impression, huh?)

Seven people you suspect are elves *

1. My mother
2. Hayden
3. Chad
4. Napoleon (the French dude)
5. Orlando Bloom
6. Will Ferrel
7. TIMMY!

Eight of Santa's reindeer (no cheating) *

1. Nordic
2. Dickens
3. Gallant
4. Prodder
5. Manly
6. Tweaker
7. Taunter
8. Melon

Nine uses for snow *

1. Getting frostbite
2. Sticking your tongue to a pole
3. Dreaming about it when you live in So. Cal
4. Peeing in it ("don't eat yellow snow")
5. Eating it
6. Snowmen
7. Pretending you're a commando on a reconnaissance mission
8. Chucking it at squirrels
9. Using nose drippings as chopsticks

Ten least favorite things about Christmas *

1. Artery clogging after egg nog
2. Familiarity with men in tights
3. Joy
4. Missile toes
5. Elves
6. Figgy pudding
7. "Happy holidays!"being the only politically correct thing to say to anybody
8. Frosty the Snowman
9. Feeling sick from all of the food that I didn't need but ate because I could
10. Having the Harry Potter movie pushed back half a year

Eleven word associations to "figgy pudding" *

1. jiggly pooting
2. noogie
3. putting
4. chop suey
5. whooping
6. piggy shooting (PIGGY CATAPULT!!!)
7. moody
8. trampoline
9. flooding
10. cermudgen
11. scrooge

Twelve reasons you love Christmas *

1. Egg Clog
2. Candy Canes
3. Being an Elf on Christmas Eve
4. Roasting Chet's nuts on an open fire (Chet is our favorite squirrel)
5. Watching funny Christmas movies
6. Trying to find the most extravagant light display on a house (nicknamed the year's "Griswold House")
7. Greed
8. Nativity
9. Carols
10. I like Santa.
11. Delicious PIES!
12. Turkey



I like Christmas..............

AWESOMENESS!!!!

HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE NEW TRAILER!!!!

*click here*

Though it is an awesome trailer, it's a bit of a slap in the face. It shows just how close the movie is to being finished, and yet, it's STILL 6 MONTHS AWAY.

GRR!

It took like three hours to get the shading on the upper lip.

I have recently been given back my art packet from my art class. Here it is!