My Many Faces

Anyone that has taken a picture of me knows that I usually make a really strange face at least once. Here's to your tolerance. This is a compiling of the many strange faces I make (click on the picture to get a closer look):

My Mother (A Tag by Aunt Angie)

All about Mom:
1. What is something mom always says to you?
"Brush your dang teeth!"
2. What makes mom happy?
When we do what we're told. (or when we suck up to her just right)
3. What makes mom sad?
Ditto, but in reverse.
4. How does mom make you laugh?
Her height.
5. What was your mom like as a child?
Cooked and learned stuff awesomely.
6. How old is your mom?
33 & 3/4... but every birthday is an annual 29th for her.
7. How tall is your mom?
Tee hee. 4'10" and 3/4, my height almost exactly. (I'm 4'10")
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Scrape crap out of people's mouths.
9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
Has a ton of fun w/ Hayden and Father. *snivel*
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Duh. Dentistry excellence.
11. What is your mom really good at?
Scraping crap out of people's mouths.
12. What is your mom not very good at?
Strolling; she's so freakin' fast when she walks. (Or I'm just a dawdler)
13. What does your mom do for her job?
DER! D-E-N-T-I-S-T-R-Y (almost).
14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Ice cream. Contrary to popular belief, she prefers it over chocolate.
15. What makes you proud of your mom?
See numbers 8, 10, 11, and 13.
16. If your mom was a cartoon character who would she be?
Definitely (as a senior) Madame Foster from Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends.
17. What do you and your mom do together?
Stuff.
18. How are you and your mom the same?
Height.
19. How are you and your mom different?
I'm gonna be taller.
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
A gut feeling, deep down in my soul, somewhere, tells me.

I NOW TAG MAEBE! MWAHAHA!

Birthdays

As today happens to be my 13th Birthday, I find it only too fitting to do one of those abstract posts about some overlooked but well-known topics. This post will be divided into several sections, each concerning a different aspect of birthdays.

I. Traditions

A.)Presents. Who came up with the idea that just because the birthday boy or girl is coming one year closer to their eventual demise, they deserve some sort of toy or some abstract little doohickey that they don't know what do do with besides burn, suck on, or torture? I'm not complaining, of course; I love having more crap to play with.

But what I'm saying is, did someone think, "Hmm... Maybe I should give this kid a toy for being a year closer to being sent to a nursing home, because I don't want them to be cranky when that time comes. Maybe when their future children finally say, 'I'm sick of having to change your diapers; I'm gonna let someone else do that for me and send you to an old folks' home,' they'll look back on this moment and say, 'I'm glad I got a Malibu Barbie for my fourth birthday,' and not be grumpy about this."

B.)Cake. Why a cake? Is this a further branch of the strange tradition of presents? Why not pie? Pie is better anyway. Birthday cake tends to be too dry to be eaten comfortably. Maybe a serial killer working at a bakery came up with this one: "I hear that Joe Billy Bob, the man who stole my cookie as a child, his little boy is having a party commemorating his one year closer to being a cranky senior. I will bake a cake called a birthday-cake, sell it to Joe Billy Bob, and when he eats it, it will be so dry he will choke and turn purple. I like purple. It's my favorite color. Maybe I should put purple frosting on the cake." Whoa. That's one of the wierdest... never mind.

C.)Candles. Why do people insist on melting candles on the already disgusting cake, and say that if you blow it out and make a wish, it'll come true? Come on. Was fire discovered on a caveman's birthday? "Ug! Fwee-fwee! AH! Naga haga ah ka na hee! Toga haka wokkah!" ("Whoa! Fire! AH! Maybe we should put that stick that's on fire in my cake! Yeah, that's a good idea!") Uh...

II. My Birthday #13

A.)13. Why is 13 the unlucky number? Hmm? Why? I'm gonna open this up for discussion in the comments. I'm sure there will be some hilarious answers. BTW: Diana, why Michael Jackson's sister...?

B.)The way I see it. I have officially entered teenagehood. What the frick?! Last I remember, I was still a vibrant, not-foul, blissfully ignorant little boy! AAAAHHHHHH! I don't want to shave, wear deodorant and/or antiperspirant, and all that other stuff! I wanna be all normal!!! *sob* *sob* *sob* *SOB*

III. "Astrology"

I don't believe. As it is, I really don't think the stars affect our behavior. It really depends on our upbringing, our spirit, and what we choose to act like. Horoscopes are just myths that people enjoy reading for entertainment, or really do believe in for odd reasons. There are so many interpretations of horoscopes that it really seems far too differed to actually have any effect on my personal belief. But, of course, as I said, it's entertaining, and here's my horrifying Star Wars interpretation of my horoscope.

Star Wars Horoscope for Gemini

Like most Geminis, you are a playful little creature. You tend to be extremely curious, craving knowledge but sometimes having a short attention span. For the most part, you are charming and lovable. But at times, you can seem scattered and high-strung. Star wars character you are most like: Ewoks

What Is Your Star Wars Horoscope?

I AM NOT LIKE A FRICKIN' EWOK!!! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT!!!